7 Ways To Build Stronger Relationships

Doesn't matter if you are single or married, there are certain ways to build these loving relationships with those who are dear to your heart. No successful relationship was built overnight, it takes a lot of work to have a strong relationship with your partner, siblings, parents, close friends or colleagues, You'll meet a lot of people, there others who'll make a huge impact in your life and those you'll eventually let go of. Doesn't matter if you are single or married, there are certain ways to build these loving relationships with those who are dear to your heart.

1. Laugh with them a lot: Do things that'll make you share a lot of laughter together. Create funny memories from your time together, it'll strengthen your relationship. This is particularly true for the romantic ones.

2. Discuss issues rather letting them build up: No relationship is free from troubles but what makes it successful is how the people involved stand the test of time when trouble comes. Resentment arises when you begin to keep things to yourself.

3. Travel together: A shared vacation not only brings you two together but creates special memories that'll be cherished forever, especially for couples. You'll end up feeling closer after a wonderful trip.

4. Spend time together alone: Make time out alone for that important person in your life. Doesn't matter if it's your partner, best friend or sibling, spending time alone with them brings you closer than ever.

5. Do nice things for each other: Making life easier for that special person in your life makes you more appealing. People build healthier relationships when they know they can rely on you.

6. Celebrate achievements together: Sharing celebrations with people close to you brings you closer to them and creates wonderful memories.

7. Complement each other: Giving compliments brings you both closer and makes them feel great about themselves because you tell them exactly how they should feel about themselves.

How to stop worrying about things you can't control

Found this, hope it helps!

9 Worry-Busting Steps

1. Make a list of your worries. Identify what you are worried about.

2. Analyze the list. "Look at whether your worry is productive or unproductive. A productive worry is one that you can do something about right now. For example, "I am going to Italy, so I may be worried about making plane and hotel reservations, This is a productive worry because I can take action now by going online to make reservations." By contrast, an unproductive worry is one which you can't do anything about. "It is more of a proliferation of 'what ifs,' over which you have no control and there is no productive action that will lead to a solution. For example, losing sleep and worrying about whether or not you will get cancer is unproductive.

3. Embrace uncertainty. Once you have isolated your unproductive worries, it's time to identify what you need to accept in order to get over them. You may need to accept your own limitations or it may be a degree of uncertainty that you need to accept. For example, you very well may get cancer some day as no one really knows what the future holds. "Many worried people equate uncertainty with a bad outcome, but uncertainty is really neutral. "When you accept uncertainty, you don't have to worry anymore. Acceptance means noticing that uncertainty exists and letting go and focusing on the things that you can control, enjoy, or appreciate.
  
4. Bore yourself calm. "Repeat a feared thought over and over and it will become boring and will go away. If your fear is dying of cancer, look in the mirror and say, "I may die of cancer. I may die of cancer." Say it enough and it will lose its power.

5. Make yourself uncomfortable. "Worriers feel that they can't tolerate discomfort, but if you practice discomfort, you will accomplish a lot more, "The goal is to be able to do what you don't want to do or things that make you uncomfortable. Worriers tend to avoid new things and situations that make them uncomfortable, such as parties or public speaking engagements. The preemptive worry helps them avoid discomfort, but if you force yourself to do the very things that make you uncomfortable, you will rely less on worry as a coping strategy.




6. Stop the clock. "Worried people often have a sense of urgency, "They think, 'I need the answer right now and if I don't get it then something terrible will happen.'" Look at the advantages and disadvantages of demanding such urgency. "Rather than focus on the sense of urgency, instead focus on what you observe right now. "Ask yourself, 'What can I do in the present moment to make my life more pleasant or meaningful? "You can either focus your mind on getting an answer right now or focus on improving the moment." The latter is the better strategy. Take a deep breath, read, or listen to music to stop the clock and curtail your anxiety.


7. Remember that it's never as bad as you think it will be. Anxiety or worry is all about anticipation. The 'what ifs' are always way worse than how you feel when something actually happens. "Worriers tend to worry about things that even if they happen, they can handle it. "Worriers are actually good at handling real problems.

8. Cry out loud. "The emotional part of the brain -- the amygdala -- is suppressed when you worry. "The emotion kicks in later with gastrointestinal symptoms, fatigue or rapid heart rate. Use your emotions; don't try to get rid of them because when you are crying or angry, you are not worried.

9. Talk about it. Beside the cognitive therapy techniques mentioned above -- which can help change troublesome behaviors -- talk therapy can also help chronic worriers worry less by getting to the root of their issues. Often talk therapy and cognitive behavior therapy can work together. Worriers tend to avoid new things and situations that make them uncomfortable, such as parties or public speaking engagements. The preemptive worry helps them avoid discomfort, but if you force yourself to do the very things that make you uncomfortable, you will rely less on worry as a coping strategy.

6. Stop the clock. "Worried people often have a sense of urgency, "They think, 'I need the answer right now and if I don't get it then something terrible will happen.'" Look at the advantages and disadvantages of demanding such urgency. "Rather than focus on the sense of urgency, instead focus on what you observe right now, "Ask yourself, 'What can I do in the present moment to make my life more pleasant or meaningful? "You can either focus your mind on getting an answer right now or focus on improving the moment." The latter is the better strategy. Take a deep breath, read, or listen to music to stop the clock and curtail your anxiety.

7. Remember that it's never as bad as you think it will be. Anxiety or worry is all about anticipation. The 'what ifs' are always way worse than how you feel when something actually happens. "Worriers tend to worry about things that even if they happen, they can handle it, Worriers are actually good at handling real problems." 

8. Cry out loud. "The emotional part of the brain -- the amygdala -- is suppressed when you worry, The emotion kicks in later with gastrointestinal symptoms, fatigue or rapid heart rate. Use your emotions; don't try to get rid of them because when you are crying or angry, you are not worried." 

9. Talk about it. Beside the cognitive therapy techniques mentioned above -- which can help change troublesome behaviors -- talk therapy can also help chronic worriers worry less by getting to the root of their issues. Often talk therapy and cognitive behavior therapy can work together.

Do girls really like bad boys?

(Culled from Fashion and Lifestyle)

Me and almost all of my male friends have argued about this... I read an article today about girls liking bad boys

They will say girls don't like good boys, they like the bad ones..the ones that are mysterious, careless, selfish with bad attitude.
I will always say it's not true...our argument sha no dey get head, and they will even show me some tweets of some girls saying that they want their man to cheat on them..this that... they are tired of everything being smooth and all..



Truthfully we all go through a phase that we want whats not good for us...or what we think we want..
But I don't support the saying 'good girls like bad boys'..
Like I stated earlier... 'it is a phase' that means it's not forever.. it is for a period of time.

And if you are a nice guy.. keep being one...you're the future.. I will not advice my daughter to go for a bad boy..

My nice ex

 I was in a relationship with this really nice guy and he was a yes-man. At first, he was not..I like being in control so I find it very attractive when my guy can talk me out of some things and I listen, then, later he started being yes-man..probably because I always say that I don't like people telling me what to do, even thou I respect anyone that actually can...

He started doing everything I wanted, It was as if He had no say in the relationship, as if i was controlling him, I started getting Irritated 

I got bored and decided to end everything, not because he was nice! but because he was not acting like a man, and he clearly does not understand my type of person, he was not what I wanted... 

TO READ THE FULL STORY VISIT FUNKE OLOTU'S BLOG @http://funkeolotu.blogspot.com.ng/

----From Rags to Riches: Let Their Stories Inspire You----

1. JAN KOUM
The founder and CEO of WhatsApp emigrated to America from
Ukraine when he was 16 years old, initially living on food stamps.
In February 2014, Facebook announced its acquisition of
WhatsApp for $19billion. He is already $19 billion richer.
2. URSULA BURNS
Ursula Burns, the chairman and CEO of Xerox, was raised by her
mother in a New York social housing project. Now she is the first
African-American woman to head a Fortune 500 company and
Forbes recently labelled her the 22nd most powerful woman in the
world.
3. SEAN CONNERY
Sean Connery joined the Royal Navy aged 16 and worked as a
bricklayer, coffin polisher and lifeguard before becoming a famous
actor.
4. OPRAH WINFREY
Oprah Winfrey was born into poverty and was raped by a relative
when she was just nine years old. By 2003, she had become the
first female African-American billionaire.
5. JK ROWLING
JK Rowling was a single mother living on benefits before she
found success with the Harry Potter series. She has said she was
"as poor as it's possible to be in this country". She is now
estimated to be worth at least $1billion.
6. SHANIA TWAIN
According to a biography, Shania Twain grew up in poverty and
started singing in bars when she was just eight to try to help
support her family. She is thought to have earned more than
$350million since.
7. HOWARD SCHULTZ
Billionaire Howard Schultz was raised in a social housing project in
Brooklyn, New York, before discovering and becoming CEO and
chairman of Starbucks.
8. DHIRUBHAI AMBANI
The popular story about one of India's most successful
businessmen is that he started with a single rupee in his hand and
ended up as patriarch of the world's second-richest family. The
company he founded in 1966, Reliance Industries, now employs
85,000 people and is estimated to contribute around five per cent
of the Indian government's total tax revenues.
9. DO WON CHANG
In the early 1980s South Korean-born Chang moved to California,
where he and his wife opened a clothes shop named Fashion 21.
As the business grew they changed the name to Forever 21. There
are currently more than 450 stores worldwide and Chang's
personal wealth is estimated at $5.4billion.
10. RALPH LAUREN
Born to Jewish immigrants from Belarus, Ralph Lauren grew up in
the Bronx, New York. After discovering his passion was designing
clothes he found work at a tie company but found his designs
continually rejected. "The world is not ready for Ralph Lauren," the
owner of the company once told him. Ralph Lauren responded by
founding his own company, one that now employs 19,000 people
and has given him a personal fortune of $7billion.
..........................................................................................
...........................
If these ones could make it, you too can. Never allow your not-so-
good background hide your abilities and greatness. With hardwork,
perseverance, focus and faith in God, you can rise above your
limitations and make your mark on the sands of time. The world is
waiting to hear your own story, are you ready for the big stage?

10 Rules Billionaires Follow to Get What They Really Want

1. Embrace change.

“Screw it, Let’s do it!” –Richard Branson

Richard Branson is a great example of how to get what you really want. The billionaire maverick whose Virgin enterprise encompasses over 400 companies, explains that you have to take chances, learn from failure and embrace change. Many of us fear change which prohibits our ability to take chances and apply lessons of failure. Until we realize that failure is part of the process of success, we will remain paralyzed. Change is a constant in life and when we don’t embrace it, be get run over by it.
2. Failure leads to innovation

“If I find 10,000 ways something won’t work, I haven’t failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step.”Thomas Edison

1 and 2 are certainly related, which should emphasize their importance. Allow the process of discovery be one that doesn’t pit perfection against discovery. When we only expect perfect results, we undermine the process that discovers the hidden innovation. Stumble forward. Break things, but learn from the what didn’t work. When you do that,there is no failure, just steps towards success.
3. Don’t be afraid to Solve Big Problems!

“When I was in college, I wanted to be involved in things that would change the world.” –Elon Musk

There is opportunity in the problems that most people find too big to solve. Elon Musktook on the space industryand the electric car, not because they were easy, but because they were hard. Where things are challenging is where you won’t be daunted by the crowds trying to accomplish the same thing. Opportunity is often found off the beaten path. Sometimes that means taking on Goliath or carving new ground.
4. Embrace Stability

“I almost never get the question: ‘What’s not going to change in the next 10 years?’ And I submit to you that that second question is actually the more important of the two —because you can build a business strategy around the things that are stable in time.” –Jeff Bezos

This might seem like a contradiction to the above points, but it’s also important to understand what is constant in the world and work with it. Simultaneously, it is important to understand that there is nuance and paradox in life, and we must embrace that and know when to shift gears.Yes there is change, but something will always be needed. If you can fulfill a need you will be in demand.
5. Don’t Expect Life to be Fair!

“Life is not fair— get used to it!”Bill Gates

A consistent hurdle in life derails many of us is the discovery that life isn’t fair. Instead of pining for a fair life, accept that it isn’t and realize that there is still infinite opportunity. By focusing on what is unequal we only succumb to victimization. Success lies in the finding our niche, not fixating on our impairments. Find out your niche and go for it!
6. Find Something you Love. Do that!

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”Steve Jobs

Most of us work forty-plus hours a week. Between that and sleep, a great deal of our life is occupied. But if we love what we do, we don’t need as much time off or vacation. We spend the bulk of our time doing what we love. Additionally, if you do what you love you will be inspired to work at it and do it at a high level. If you hate your work you will resent doing it and will be incapable of achieving inspired results. Plus you’ll be tired and resentful in the time you have to do what you want.
7. Don’t be Pressured into bad decisions!

“The stock market is a no-called-strike game. You don’t have to swing at everything — you can wait for your pitch.” –Warren Buffett

Sometimes there is the perception that there are once-in-a-lifetime-opportunities. Warren Buffett suggests that opportunities are like trains, there’s always one leaving and one arriving. Choose yours. Have you ever been pressured by a friend or family member to take advantage of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? The very concept implies that opportunities are finite and it plays to our fears. Fear should not motivate us. We should allow that which inspires us to move us. Then we are invested personally in our investments.
8. Don’t Listen to Naysayers!

“Most entrepreneurial ideas will sound crazy, stupid and uneconomic, and then they’ll turn out to be right.” –Reed Hastings

Revolutionary innovation is such because most people thought it wasn’t possible. Don’t listen to them. That’s why they didn’t do it. Innovative people have made fools of their critics along their paths to success. An old saying in stock buying is buy hysteria and sell euphoria. Basically do the opposite of what the masses do. There is a reason it’s lonely at the top, most people don’t get there.
9. Cut yourself some Slack!

“Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they’re finished.” –Dan Gilbert

Dan Gilbert expresses the sentiment that we are often our own worst enemies. Give yourself a break. You’re not supposed to be perfect. If you are working against yourself, how can you expect others to work for you or with you? Additionally, if you pile on yourself for every misstep along your journey, you will quickly become exhausted. Instead, save your valuable energy and realize that you’re okay. keep going and don’t judge.
10. Visualize!

You’ve got to visualize where you’re headed and be very clear about it. Take a polaroid picture of where you’re going to be in a few years.Sara Blakely

If you don’t care where you want to go, you’re sure to get there. But if you have have a goal, then you have something to shoot for. In order to achieve your goals you must be able to visualize them. Visualizing allows you to not only know what you’re trying to create in your life, it helps you keep yourself accountable when you’re off-track or perhaps found something better. When you have no goal, it’s easy to simply circle the drain, aimlessly.
Ultimately, these ten innovators have change the world and if you adhere to these ten principles you will find yourself carving out a successful path.

A Little Article About "Friendship

Why good friends are so important

A lot of research has been done looking into the benefits of friendship, and the research has found exactly what you might expect. It turns out that the better quality relationships you have; the more likely you are to be happy. Therefore it’s good for your happiness to be a great friend to someone and to have a group of good friends supporting you. But it can be hard to pinpoint exactly what makes a good friend. 

Signs of a good friend

Friends will come and go in your life, but more important than how long a friendship lasts, is that a good friend will love you for who you are. The way you can tell the sign of a good friend is by looking at the actions they take –big and small – that show they care.

Some common signs of a good friend include 

• someone who will support you no matter what
• someone you can trust and who won’t judge you
• someone who won’t put you down or deliberately hurt your feelings
• someone who is kind and has respect for you
• someone who will love you because they choose to, not because they feel like they should
• someone whose company you enjoy
• showing loyalty
• being trustworthy and willing to tell you the truth, even when it’s hard
• someone who can laugh when you do
• someone who is willing to stick around when things get tough
• someone who makes you smile
• someone who is there to listen
• someone who will cry when you cry.

How to be a good friend

If you want to do all or many of the things listed above for someone you care about, you’re already a good friend. It’s also common though, to not know exactly what to do or say to be there for someone. Some practical things you can do to be there for a friend include:

Listen. Listening is so important not to underestimate, but it can be hard to do. The best way to listen is to try and understand the situation from your friends’ point of view. If you aim to do this, you’ll naturally find yourself beginning to ask the right sort of questions and they will appreciate having someone who really cares about how they feel and what they’re going through. You don’t have to have all the answers, and you shouldn’t assume your friend wants advice – they might just want to talk so that they can work out what they’re going to do themselves.

Ask them what they need. If you’re worried about someone and you want to be there for them, just ask them what they need- that way you know what they find helpful during tough times, and you can be there in a way that’s most useful to them.

Get physical. Smiles and hugs are a great way to show friends that they’re not alone, that you’re there for them, and that they are important.

Keep in touch. Even if you guys aren’t nearby each other, making an effort to keep in touch through facebook, emails, texts and calls will show your friend you are there for them.

Tell them how you feel. You don’t have to make a big deal of it all the time but sometimes there are moments where letting someone know that they’re important to you through something you say, can make a big difference to how someone is feeling.

Get the facts. If your friend has a medical condition, or a mental health issue, a good way to offer support is to learn about what they’ve been diagnosed with. Taking an interest in what they’re going through shows that you care, and that you’re planning to stick around no matter what’s going on.

Be willing to make a tough call. If you think the safety of your friend is at risk, you might need to act without their consent and get help (see the sidebar for where you can seek help). It can be a hard choice particularly when you’re worried about their reaction, but remember that you are acting because you care and you don’t want them to be hurt

4 Good Reasons For A Man To Hit A Woman & 5 Bad Reasons Women Let Men Hit Them

"Please take the time to give the article a read.
No one deserves to be abused. That goes for women and men.
It's not acceptable on EITHER side."

this Article was written by Troy the Locator on his Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/TroyTheLocator

Lately, there has been much discussion about violence against women by the men in their life. Many have said there is never a good reason for a man to strike a woman but I disagree and today I am speaking out! I have six sons and I have taught them what my father taught my brothers and I: there are four good reasons for a man to hit the woman he loves;
1. Fire. If you look over at the woman you love and discover flames have overtaken your girl, you should absolutely knock her to the ground and start rolling her around.
2. Spider. If your princess discovers a spider wandering across her shoulder and with sheer terror in her voice says “GET. IT. Off! You should smack that 8 legged sucker right off of her.
3. Choking. If over dinner she begins to laugh at another one of your amazingly funny stories and in the process, lodges a bit of her steak in her throat, you have my full support to yank her out of her chair, spin her around and start squeezing her beneath her rib-cage until she spits up!
4. Train. If, while enjoying a peaceful, after dinner walk with your lover, you notice she has wandered into the path of a quickly approaching oncoming train, by all means, grab her by her arm and like the strong man you are, yank her backwards aggressively.

Absent the presence of fire, spiders, choking or trains, dad taught us boys there is never, ever, ever, ever, ever a justifiable reason for a man to strike a woman. Period. He said real men don’t do it. He then added this important definition about being a ‘real man’ which I want to share with all men today;
“Real men don’t allow other men to hit women either.”
I call upon my brothers-in-manhood everywhere to join with me in ZERO TOLERANCE for violence against women. Don’t hit and don’t tolerate hitting. That woman you see getting abused by her “man”, at the club or in the parking lot or even, oh let’s say, an elevator; intervene. Put yourself between the abuser and the victim. Is that dangerous? Could be. But it’s what a real man would do. Always remind yourself when you witness violence on a woman- that is somebody’s mother, daughter or sister.
Just for the record, it IS your business if you decide to make it your business. In the Dunn household, my sons know we consider the safety of other women, our personal business, whether the abuser likes it or not.
Lastly, a note to the abused women of the world- do not take one more punch, slap or kick from any man. There is NOTHING that makes it okay. Stop making excuses for him. He is a broken man and needs to be repaired before he is worthy of spending another second in your presence. Insist on it.

5 Bad Reasons Women Let Men Hit Them;
1. “He was drunk”. So what? He will be drunk again. And although I have personally never been drunk, I know many people who do occasionally get intoxicated- NONE of them hit their women. Your husband or boyfriend is not NORMAL. Stop trying to convince yourself he is.
2. “He’s under a lot of stress”. Real men deal with stress by hitting the gym, hitting a golf ball or even hitting the buffet. They do NOT hit women. Stress is not a gateway emotion to violence for healthy, normal men.
3. “I deserved it”. What???? No. There is nothing you or any woman can do to validate violence against you. Maybe you have done something so bad he leaves you, but violence is not on the list of options for him to choose from when he is upset. NEVER AN OPTION.
4. “His dad abused his mom. It’s all he knows.” When I hear that statement, it makes me throw up a little in my mouth. So what if he witnessed abuse as a child?? If anything, he knows better than others the hurt and pain that comes from abuse. In life we witness lots of things that are bad but we don’t then go integrate them into our own lives. If your man abuses you because he witness abuse, let him go witness therapy. Let him go witness a support group. Let him go witness life alone without you and the children.
5. “It was only once. He apologized.” Statistics say that where there is a “first time”, there is a second time. Your response to the “first time” needs to send an incredibly clear message to your “man” that there will be no second time. Send that message so clearly it haunts him. Make a bold statement with action attached. It is the ‘action’ that will signal the level of your seriousness. That might be calling the police, it might be moving out for a week or two, it might be telling him to leave for a week or require immediate counseling. Your words to him after being hit MUST be followed up with immediate action to reinforce the true level of intolerance you have for violence against yourself.
You might be shocked to learn that someone in your life is an abuser, which means somebody in your life is a victim. Rather than guessing who it might be, just share this article with everyone so it reaches the ones who need to hear it most.
Abusers, be on notice- I’m watching. My sons are watching. And millions of other real men are watching. We WILL defend and protect your wife, your mother and your sister…even from you.
 Troy Dunn

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